


Replacement For A Man

by bkwrm523



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-04-18 13:49:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14214501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bkwrm523/pseuds/bkwrm523
Summary: Castiel is very tired.  Very very tired.  He makes a poor suggestion; luckily, there are other options.





	Replacement For A Man

The first week or so after learning that Castiel had allowed Lucifer out of his cage, none of you were all right.  Sam had torn the library apart.  You’d half expected him to organize it, but all he could think about was finding a way to save Castiel.  You and Dean had helped in between other things, but Sam barely did anything else.  Dean spent hours at the firing range, until you managed to convince him he was wasting ammo.  Then he cleaned every inch of the bunker.  You?  You had just lost your boyfriend to Lucifer.  Nothing was all right.  You spent days in your room, mostly just crying.  Until Dean found you on the third day.  He didn’t say a word when he came in; just climbed into bed with you and held you, letting you cry into his shirt for a solid hour.  Then he pulled you into your bathroom, starting a shower and getting the water warm for you before leaving you for privacy, with orders to wash yourself thoroughly and brush your teeth.  You’d emerged a short time later, clad in a towel, to find him waiting outside your bathroom door.  Dean had given you clothes, you hadn’t really noticed what.  Jeans and a big, comfy t-shirt.  And your thickest, comfy socks.  He’d turned around while you changed, then pulled you outside your room.  Dean had made you eat, then made you help him clean the bunker.

You spared a moment to thank whoever for Dean Winchester.  Having something to do had brought you back, let you focus until you could function.

About a week later, you were mostly better.  At least, as better as you could be with Castiel still… in the state he was.  It was around then that certain realities of the situation occurred to you.  You weren’t happy, but there wasn’t really anything to be done about it.  So you’d sighed and put away your toys for the forseeable future.  About a week after that, your mood had started to sour.  Eventually, it soured enough that the boys noticed.

“What’s eating you lately?”  Predictably, it was Dean who first commented on it.  This time, it was after you’d snapped at him over the state of the kitchen.

“Yeah.  I mean, we’re a little worried about you, y/n.”  Sam chimed in, surprising you.  “This isn’t like you.”  You gave a huge sigh.  This would not be an easy conversation.

“Fine.  But this is going to be weird.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”  Dean opened his mouth, probably about to blurt something out, but an elbow from Sam stopped him.  “I can’t… I mean I haven’t…. you know.”  You made some vague, aimless gestures with your hands, hoping that the boys would just somehow catch on.  It took a moment, but eyebrows rose and Sam and Dean exchanged a slightly strained look.

“Sure.  Yeah, since Cas…. but you gotta have… stuff.  To do it yourself.”  Dean replied, slightly less awkwardly than you did.

“Dean, you’re not getting it.  Angels can hear if someone has a longing for them.  Kind of like a prayer.  And if Cas can hear it, can Lucifer?  I’d have to be  _sure_ that I could…. get through it, without thinking about Cas at all.  Even once.”  You explained to Sam and Dean, in a gentle voice, awkwardness momentarily gone. The boys looked shocked as your explanation permeated, and they both just sat there for a moment in thought.  You almost laughed at their reaction; it was like you’d told them you had treatable cancer, but couldn’t afford treatment.  They both seemed to see this as a much bigger problem than it was.

“I could -” Dean began, his words getting stuck in his throat, until he cleared his throat and tried again.  “I could give you a hand with that, if you wanted.  I can  _guarantee_ you wouldn’t be thinking about Cas.”  You smiled at Dean, trying to pull out his charm despite the immense awkwardness of the situation.  You needed to let him down  _gently_.

“Without asking Cas?”  You asked, still keeping your voice gentle.  “There’s a word for that, Dean.  It’s called cheating.  But I appreciate the thought.”  Dean glanced down, looking disappointed, but not wounded.  Much to your relief.

“Yeah, but - I mean you…” Dean fumbled around for a sentence, disbelief on his face.

“It’s just sex, Dean.  Won’t be much  _fun_ , but I’ll survive.”  You informed the boys calmly, and left the room to go clean the kitchen yourself.  It would probably be better for you to keep yourself busy.

***

Over the intervening time, you were careful to stay busy.  Dean mostly relinquished his household chores to you.  Sam accused Dean of laziness, but you weren’t so sure.  Dean probably placed more importance on sex than anyone you’d known in recent memory.  He was, you assumed, not just thinking of you not having sex today.  This kind of thing could build and build over time.  Cleaning, especially cleaning particularly gross things, tended to completely kill sexual desire.  Dean was, you thought, trying to help you last.  It was both laughably childish, and sweetly ingenious.  All very ‘Dean’.

Sam pitched in too, a little to your surprise.  Not that Sam was less kind than Dean, but you hadn’t really expected him to treat this as such a big problem as Dean seemed to think it was.  But like his brother, Sam’s assistance was subtle, but there.  He asked your help more often on research; to the point of doing very little work in research himself, and letting you do most of the work.  During the slowest days, you both at Sam’s suggestion, started cataloging the library.  The goal, Sam had decided, was to get a thorough list of everything you currently had, then figure out the library’s  _current_ organization and decide if it needed changing.  He invited you on his morning runs, and you exercised more than you had.

All in all, it was a display both of how clever and intelligent both men were, as well as how sweet they were.  You were more touched by it all than you expected.

***

And then you had Castiel back.  You hardly noticed the boys giving Castiel their own greetings, trying to say how happy they were that he was okay.  All you could focus on was your arms around his shoulders, him holding you close, and trying to pour all your love for him through the hug until you were alone and you could tell him.  Sam or Dean had probably urged Castiel to take you both somewhere private, as you soon found yourself being carried to your room.  There were lots of tearful apologies, and hours of intent cuddle-therapy.

Sam was in the library, searching through another tome for hints on defeating the darkness. Since Cas had come back, he hadn’t asked for Y/n’s help, she needed time to reconnect with Cas, emotionally  _and_ physically.  As much as he missed having another person research with him, Sam did enjoy the time by himself, and could fully immerse himself into the work, without worrying about not talking to the other person.  Which is exactly what he was doing when Y/N walked into the library.  He didn’t have to look up to know that there was something wrong; the noises of pure distress that Y/N was making was enough.  Sam looked up from his research, and immediately regretted it.  Y/N was clearly in some sort of vexation, and from the looks of it, was on the verge of imploding.

“Are you okay?”  Sam asked hesitantly after a moment, as gingerly as if he were defusing a bomb.

“He - I - ummm…”  Y/n gestured aimlessly with her hands as she plopped down in a nearby chair.  She trailed off, clearly searching for words and failing.

“Is Cas okay?”  Sam asked again, trying to help by narrowing down the subject.

“Yeah!  I mean, he’s good.  Doing… uh, healing good.  And all.”

“Did he …. like, say something?  Something… uh, Cas-like?”  Sam was starting to wince a little, and his voice was sounding strained.  Castiel’s transition to human culture had been an odd one, and there were still basic things he didn’t grasp that often led to awkward conversations.  Y/n had, by far, always been the one to handle these conversations the best.  She had an unflappable calm that was rarely upset by Castiel’s often too-pointed questions, usually finding them funny and cute rather than uncomfortable.  The concept of one of Castiel’s Cas-isms unsettling her this much worried Sam.  Not worried that she was hurt somehow; but it was looking more and more like  _he_ would have to deal with it.

This wasn’t going to be fun.

“He - um, I… yeah.  Yes, he did.”  Y/n replied, attempting to detail exactly what, but failing again.  Sam waited a moment for her to elaborate, but she remained silent.

“Do you want to tell me what?”  Sam asked hesitantly.

“It… umm… could you- fuck.  Could you talk to him?  Please?  I can’t - he…”  Y/n asked, looking up at Sam pleadingly.  Sam took a deep breath, resisting the urge to sigh.  He couldn’t say no, but this was going to be difficult, he could tell.

“Yeah.  No problem.”  Sam replied, hiding his hesitation.  He stood, patting her comfortingly on the shoulder as he left the room.

As Sam left the room, Dean entered it. He was almost a third of the way across the library when he noticed Y/n sat slumped in one if the library chairs. He walked towards her, worry and confusion etched on his face. The way she was sitting, and the look of confusion on her face was unsettling. Castiel was back, so there was no reason for her to be looking so glum. Okay, yes, the Darkness was still out there roaming around doing God knew what (actually, now that Dean thought about it, maybe God  _didn’t_ know what she was up to), but that was more his and Sam’s problem at the moment. All she needed to be focusing on was her angel boyfriend, and catching up on lost time, in more ways than one.

“Hey, you okay?”  Dean asked, pausing in the entrance of the library.

“I - um, n- I… I’m… healthy.”  It took Y/n several moments to come up with the reply.  She felt proud.  It was  _almost_ understandable, and kind of answered his question.

“… okay.  What’s bugging you?”  Dean wasn’t fooled by Y/n’s lackluster performance for a minute.  He faced her squarely, trying to look like he wasn’t being a total big brother.  Y/n made some flailing-type gestures with her hands, and actually started hyperventilating a little.  Growing concerned, Dean swiftly crossed over to her, bent down a little, and put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

“Whoa, whoa, slow down.”  Dean urged her, keeping his voice calm and level.  “You want some water?”

“Yeah.”  Y/n managed after a moment in a weak voice.  “That’d be nice.”

“Okay.  Just - sit here.  I’ll go get you some water.”  Dean urged her.  He waited for her to nod, before he hurried off to the kitchen to fetch the water.

“There you go.”  Dean said after he returned, making sure her hands were steady enough to hold the glass before he let it go.  “Now, you ready to tell me what happened?”  Before Y/n could attempt another likely disastrous reply, Sam came into the library.

Dean could tell by Sam’s face that whatever the problem was, it involved Castiel.  And he’d probably done something weird again.  Sam had a particular bitchface he used when he had reached his limit of Castiel’s unintentional faux pas’.

“He tell you?”  Y/n asked Sam in a weak voice before Dean could speak.

Sam pressed his lips together tightly for a moment before replying.  “Yeah.  Yeah, he did.”

“What’d the nerdy goof do now?”  Dean asked them, sounding tired.  He had no idea what had transpired, but given that both Sam and Y/n looked over their limit of Cas-isms, he wasn’t looking forward to hearing it.

“Well,” Sam began, sparing Y/n the trouble of failing to explain again.  “Cas isn’t recovered enough for… conjugal… stuff.  And he knows she’s been… abstaining while all this crap happened.  So he, uh,  _ordered_ Y/n to go out and look for company tonight.  Apparently, he’s worried about her health.”

Dean listened to Sam’s explanation, and couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing.

“You’ve got a weird boyfriend, Y/n.”  Was the first thing that popped out of Dean’s mouth.  Y/n buried her face in her hands, and Sam glared at Dean.

“I know.”  Y/n replied, slightly muffled behind her hands.  There were a few moments of silence as Y/n and Sam sat in mutual distress, before Dean sighed.  So he’d have to handle it.  Again.

“I’ll go talk to him.”  Dean said reluctantly, standing from his chair.

“Dean, you don’t have to.”  Y/n said suddenly, dropping her hands and looking at him, her face suddenly a little guilty.  “It’s not a big deal, I can-”

“Stop.  It’s fine.  Let me talk to him.”  Dean interrupted her, trying to reassure her.  She gave him a weak smile, which he returned, before making his way to y/n’s room.

Castiel was in y/n’s bed, watching netflix.  He was under the covers, but had, as far as Dean could tell, only ditched the trench coat.  Dean had to resist the urge to shake his head.  The dorky angel had no understanding of humans sometimes, even after a few years.

“Dean.”  Castiel greeted him, looking away from the television at Dean’s entrance.  “Have I done something wrong?  Sam and Y/n seemed to be upset when I spoke to them.”

“No one’s mad, Cas.”  Dean reassured the worried angel.  “We’re all glad to have you back.  It’s just- you can’t just tell your girlfriend to go get some tail.”

“Why not?”  Castiel asked.  “She has been abstaining for too long due to my absence.  She thought it would be inappropriate to seek sexual satisfaction with anyone without my permission.  I believe she requires some, but I-”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.  Okay, stop.  First, don’t say things like ‘sexual satisfaction’ around me, dude.  It’s weird.  Second, couples don’t  _do_ that.  You’re gonna make her think you’re pimping her out, and she’ll get pissed.”

Castiel gave an exasperated sigh.  “Well, what else should I do?  I’m worried about her.”

“Calm down.”  Dean replied irritably.  “There’s other options if you’re too tired to get it up.”  Dean paused a moment, accepting that the conversation was probably about to get much more awkward than any others in recent memory, and proceeded into a very long lecture.

The way Castiel watched him as he spoke, Dean could almost see the angel taking notes.

***

When Dean returned to the library, you and Sam were amicably discussing one of the books.  Neither of you had any desire to discuss Castiel’s odd request further at the moment.

“I realize we’ve mostly just met the crazies lately, but-” You pressed your point further with Sam, unwilling to give up just yet.  Really, you didn’t care that much.  But it was something to do to pass the next few minutes, and Sam seemed to agree.

“All right, you’re up.”  Dean interrupted you, coming back into the library and patting your shoulder lightly.  “I talked him down.  You should get back in there, though.”

“Thanks, Dean.”  You smiled at the older Winchester, before following his advice.  Dean almost seemed a little smug as you left, but you shoved your wonder aside.  Time to get back to your angel.

***

Castiel smiled when you came back into the room, warming you effortlessly.  He wordlessly opened his arms, an invitation you eagerly accepted as you snuggled into his side with a happy sigh.  You were wearing little today, in anticipation of a lazy day.  A huge tshirt you’d probably stolen from one of the boys, as it came down just past your ass, and a faded pair of pajama shorts.  No socks and no bra.  It’d made you a little cold as you’d wandered the bunker earlier, but your angel radiated heat and quickly warmed you up.

Castiel was lying on his back in the middle of your bed, tucked underneath the covers as you’d insisted earlier.  You had gotten under them with him, laying on your side and half on top of you angel.  One of your arms was pinned between you and the mattress.  Honestly, having laid in this position before, you strongly suspected Castiel’s grace’s involvement.  It was rare that you could lie like this with someone without your entire arm going numb.  As it was, your hand and arm felt squeezed, but totally fine.  Not even sore.  Your other hand lay in the middle of Castiel’s chest.  You’d drawn aimless little circles on his chest for awhile, but eventually stopped and just grabbed a wadded handful of his tie and left your hand there.  Your head was on Castiel’s shoulder, and his near arm was wrapped around you, cradling your frame and holding you close to him.  His hand rested around the middle of your back, stroking you lightly and tracing little circles with his fingertips that made you shiver.  His other hand he pulled up onto his chest and clasped your hand in his gently, stilling your movements with it, and making you smile at his need for contact.

“Dean informed me I may have made you feel like a prostitute earlier.  I apologize.”  Castiel broke the silence after awhile.  You looked up his chest, to see bright blue eyes fixed on you, a hidden flash of guilt in them nonetheless visible to you.  

“It’s okay, sweetie.  You didn’t offend me, and I didn’t feel like that.”  You reassured him quickly.  Castiel’s emotions had been still a little tender after his recent ordeal, and you were being careful to be sweet and gentle with him, reassuring him of forgiveness any time it seemed like he was asking for it.  Poor Castiel had been denied forgiveness a few key times in his life, and you tried to be sensitive of his need for it after even the smallest of mistakes.  Another smile broke out on his face, and you were struck by how it made you feel lighter, happy, every single time you saw it.

“I’m glad to hear that.”  Castiel replied.  You didn’t take in his words for a long moment; simply struck by his happiness.  Castiel lifted a hand and stroked your cheek, making you hum in pleasure, close your eyes, and lean into his touch.

“I retrieved your vibrator while you left the room.”  Castiel’s voice murmured.  Your eyes were shut, so you just heard his mouth startlingly close to your ear.  His breath curled against your skin, causing you to gasp, and your eyes to fly open dramatically.  His blue eyes so close to yours captivated you, and you almost missed the mischievous spark in them.

“Uhhm, what?”  You stammered, still caught in his eyes.

“Your vibrator.”  Castiel replied, smirking.  Still half laying on his chest, you could feel his voice rumble before you heard it, reigniting the spark in your belly and making your core suddenly slick with need.  “I retrieved it from where you had it stored.  It’s on top of the nightstand on my side of the bed at the moment.

Okay, you had  _no_ idea how you’d missed that earlier, but a quick glance over his chest showed that he was right.  You strongly suspected his grace’s involvement somehow.

“Ummm, okay.”  You replied after a moment, unsure of what you were supposed to be saying.

“I do not have sufficient energy at the moment to ‘get it up’, as Dean put it, but perhaps you could masturbate.  You abstained previously out of fear of Lucifer, but that is not a concern now.”  Castiel’s eyes bored into you, and you swallowed, almost losing yourself in the sound of his voice.  As horny and deprived as you were, him saying the word “masturbate” was definitely enough to get you ready.  You stayed totally still for a moment, needing all your self control to stop yourself from just grinding on his leg.  Castiel inhaled sharply, and his eyes almost seemed to turn a brighter blue.  Without looking away, he released your hand on his chest, reaching to the side, and the vibrator flew into his hand.

“I can smell how aroused you are.”  Castiel rumbled.  “Let me help.”  You whimpered a little, quite incapable of speech, and nodded.  Castiel’s eyes flashed in delight at his victory, and he leaned his head down to kiss you.  You moaned and closed your eyes, eagerly surrendering to the demand in his kiss.  Castiel rolled, dislodging you, onto his side.  His arm now trapped under you moved down to clench your ass, drawing another whimper and moan from you.  You felt his free hand drift under your shirt, reaching up to grab and massage a breast.  You whined, trying to pull away to beg him for more, more contact, more  _anything_.  But Castiel growled when you moved.  His lips followed yours, and you felt his grace wrap around the back of your head and firmly hold you in place.  You couldn’t stop the noises coming from you, muffled by his greedy lips.  You kept letting out moans and whines and whimpers almost constantly.  His fingers finally pinched a nipple  _just_ hard enough to feel perfect, making you gasp into his mouth.  A tendril of grace snuck under your shirt, attaching to the neglected nipple, making it feel pinched and sucked and caressed until you wailed a little into his mouth.

Castiel released your lips, and you gasped finally for air.  Moments later, the breath was driven out of your lungs as his mouth attached to your neck, traveling down it painfully slowly and spending minutes on every remembered spot that drove you wild.  You thrashed, trying to squirm away from the pleasurable torment, but between his hands and grace, you didn’t make it far.

That’s when you felt the vibrator.  It pressed against the inside of one thigh, supported by Castiel’s grace.

“Ah, fuck!”  You yelled and thrashed, startled arousal driven by your instinct to squirm away from the pleasurable feelings.  But you still couldn’t move far, and the vibrator trailed up your leg, supported by nothing.

Sometimes, you really hated how many extra hands his grace effectively gave him.

Your bottom hand was still trapped under you, and your free hand flew up and buried in his hair, clenching and tugging, trying desperately to get him to move.  But it was like pulling on a mountain.  One of his hands still massaged your ass firmly, the other was buried up your shirt and massaging a breast, pinching a nipple.  His mouth found yet another sensitive spot on your neck and he paused there, sucking hard with a happy little moan.  His grace attended to your other breast and pushed the vibrator up your leg and inside your shorts, moving slowly but steadily towards your dripping cunt.  You whined and whimpered and thrashed, faintly hearing yourself calling his name and pleading.  Your underwear was swiftly pulled to the side by another tendril of grace, and you felt the vibrator turn on just as it touched your outer folds.  It was on the lowest setting, and just the tip swiped around your folds, teasingly gathering moisture.  You thrashed and writhed and kicked, trying to get closer.

“Cas,” you whined.  “Cas please.  Fuck, Cassie… Castiel please!”  You cried, finally biting his shoulder in an effort to contain yourself.  His full name passed your lips, and the vibrator  _finally_ pushed into you.  You threw back your head and wailed his full name as it pushed inside of you ever so slowly.  You whimpered and bit his shoulder again, unable to take it as he pushed the vibrator into you so slowly, you almost wondered if it was even moving.  Halfway in, the vibrator clicked inaudibly again, to the next highest setting, and you cried out uncontrollably and kicked your legs.  Castiel chuckled at your reaction, his face buried in the crook of your neck.  You arched your back into him as the vibrator continued to press into you, driven mindless with pleasure already after so long abstaining.  You were on the edge of orgasm, and the vibrator wasn’t even in you all the way yet.   _Finally_ , the vibrator hilted in you, pushing the nub firmly against your cliterous.  Castiel turned the vibrator to another, stronger setting just in time as it hilted, and you screamed his name.

The world stopped spinning for a moment as you were thrown into a powerful orgasm, electricity running through your veins as the vibrator continued to churn inside you, held perfectly still by Castiel’s grace.  Your pussy clenched around it, almost stranglingly tight, as shockwaves rippled through you, throwing you higher and higher into pleasure.  Time seemed to slow, and all you could feel was the vibrator in you, throwing your orgasm higher and higher, until it seemed endless and you were scratching at Castiel’s shoulders and pleading to  _just let you down already_!  Your vision blurred, and tears leaked from your eyes, but the orgasm slowly receded, until you slumped against Castiel, panting hard.  The vibrator clicked off, and his hands released the parts of you they’d been caressing to wrap his arms around you and hold you.  Some time ago, you’d been too lost to pleasure to notice when, he’d stopped marking your neck, and now just nuzzled his head in your hair, laying a chaste kiss on your ear.

“My human.”  Castiel purred with a very satisfied tone of voice, making you moan weakly.  You probably should have said something, but you were too weak from the orgasm.  It had been  _much_ too long, and you were limply grateful at Castiel’s dogged determination to attend to your hormones tonight.

You’d almost decided to just mutter a soft ‘love you’, when the vibrator clicked back on.  Your eyes widened comically, your legs jerked and you made a startled squeak.  Castiel chuckled darkly, nuzzling your ear and cranking up the vibrator swiftly.  You moaned desperately and wiggled in his arms, imprisoned in his embrace.  His grace, still holding your vibrator, pulled it out a little and started thrusting with it.

It had only been moments since your last orgasm, so you quickly found yourself worryingly close to the precipice again.  You squealed and writhed in his arms, begging and whining and pleading that you  _weren’t ready just wait_!

“Color?”  Castiel asked, murmuring softly into your ear.  His sudden worry injected slight fear into his tone.

“Green.”  You replied a breath later, wasting no time in reassuring him.  “Fuck, Cas, notyetholdoni’mnotreadyy…” the only clear word was ‘green’.  The rest of the sentence was rushed and jumbled, barely comprehensible.  The vibrator moved up to the highest setting, and Castiel thrust it hard into you, holding it buried inside of you, until you cried his name and orgasmed again.

You shattered, thrashing into him, still restrained by his arms around you.  Your hands and legs jerked, hitting him in accidents that might have been painful, were he human.  As it was, you didn’t even move him.  You gasped and cried his name, cursing him as the vibrator thrummed on inside you, ratcheting your orgasm on and on, until it was almost as long as the first one.  You finally came down, despite the unslowing vibrator, and another thrust threw you right into another orgasm.

Castiel kept going, until your total count was somewhere around five.  You’d lost count quickly.  The vibrator clicked off, and his grace removed it from your exhausted pussy slowly and carefully, before it was pulled out of your shorts and vanished.  You collapsed forwards into Castiel’s body.  He rolled back onto his back, pulling you with him and holding you as you panted and gasped for air.

“Mine.”  Castiel murmured softly, kissing the top of your head and nuzzling into you.  You made a tiny moan, trying to force your overtired muscles to snuggle into him.  Castiel’s grace flooded through you, not arousing you this time, but checking you and healing your injuries, making you feel bathed in his soothing presence.


End file.
